Mom’s Corner

Transitions….or Where Will You Settle One Day??

Having sold our beautiful home two years ago and moved to a walking town we love, people often ask what my plans are for the future. Will I settle here permanently? When will I decide? I often answer that with my daughter being a Diabetic 1, I just don’t want to make a firm commitment to anything right now. I want to wait and see where she will attend college. My daughter is 12 years old and a rising 8th grader. She has 5 years until college. Their quizzical looks reveal their thoughts to me.

We have many weeks when her bg’s are perfectly within range and there is no bg stress at all. During those times, diabetes management fits seamlessly into our lives and we just go with the flow, you know? During those weeks, I fervently study the housing situation in my town, trying to figure out which street I love the best (can’t decide). I fantasize about buying a small place in Italy, or France, or Sweden – my second home. Then…we have a night like last night. The kind of night that makes me shake in my boots; the kind of night that makes me cry from my belly; the kind of night that shakes me to my very core…

The evening started out quite fun, actually. Cat and I walked over tofor blog Palmer Square to watch an outdoor movie; ate ice cream from Bent Spoon-yum! (lavender and rum for me, OMG! Worth the wait in line). With our bags of home-made popcorn, bottled water and our lawn chairs, we settled in for an evening of Charlotte’s Web. It was almost 10pm when we arrived back home. Around 11-ish her bg dipped below 70. (whaaa??? After eating 2 large scoops of ice-cream?? ) I assumed she had just taken extra insulin since she knows that milk and milk products tend to raise her blood sugar a little higher than other foods. Thinking it would pass over, I gave her ¼ cup of apple juice, which usually shoots her bg back to where it should be, or even higher. The effect was minimal after 30 minutes. Then I suspended her glucose delivery (she wears an Omnipod®) – she still had 3.9 units on board and I didn’t want her getting more insulin while I was giving her apple juice to increase her bg. Between midnight and 2am it remained below 70 despite my greatest efforts and suspended insulin. You never want to give too much apple juice too quickly because the result can be elevated bgs for 3 to 4 hours. Well…what to do? I told her to go to sleep and not to worry because I would keep an eye on things. Thanks to our Dexcom® CGM (continuous glucose monitor) I can see her bg readings at all times assuming she has calibrated as she should (another story) and assuming I have wi-fi (no problem at home, but at friends’ homes it’s another story). So she went to sleep and I remained awake – watching where the bg would go. I had to wake her up twice to test and for more apple juice. Finally, at around 4am, her bg settled above 70 and I finally settled down to sleep.

Then it hit me. Who will watch her when she is away at college? It’s not a matter of just watching the bg readings – I can see those from anywhere. It’s a matter of being there to physically wake her up to give her apple juice, or to not wake her up but still administer insulin while she is sleeping and completely unaware. It’s a matter of dealing with a kid who spends an entire evening with her Dexcom® alarm going off because her numbers aren’t right, so that she is now desensitized to the sound of the alarm. It is a matter of life and death – or at the very least, a matter of a compromised life and constant crisis; no thank you.

Cat is the most responsible kid I know. She is among one of the most responsible people I know. I know that she will grow into her increased responsibilities – whatever they may be.. We all have responsibilities, burdens and blessings; but isn’t it great to have someone to share them with?? Wouldn’t we all love to go back to sleep with no worries because you’re certain someone is watching over you? So for now, I have no answers, and for me, that’s quite all right. I don’t feel a burning desire to know exactly what tomorrow will bring – I love to take the road less traveled, and two years into our diabetes journey, this road is still new to us. So we take it day by day, each day living life to the fullest, not planning too much because we all know what happens to the best laid plans……

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